So I wholeheartedly believe that when you are growing as a person that there will be plenty of opportunities to exercise that new muscle.
I struggle as a people pleaser, but mostly with the people closest to me. Their opinion weighs very heavily on my heart. And today I was given a prime opportunity to work that people pleasing muscle. To practice being ok with my imperfections. It was science day in our house and suffice it to say neither experiment went according to plan. But the kids had a great time and the videos were funny.
Within 10 minutes of posting them two of my favorite people commented on how it should have been done. They were not being mean or critical at all. However I took it as a comment on my abilities as a parent.
My first reaction was of shame (as if I had failed my kids because I didn’t do it right) and my second was defensive anger, I wanted to post a smart comment reminding them that I have a degree and the plan was to have fun which we succeeded in and that my kids are smart enough to know that part of the scientific method is trial and error.
None of these responses would have helped me feel better or change the loved ones opinions. I know they were trying to give me tips for next time. However it took me a few minutes of internal ranting for my common sense to kick in.
My point? I take heart in the fact that I know my kids had a good day being silly and my friends and family enjoyed the funny videos. That’s what matters, and I let the negative feelings go before they acted out or hurt my heart.
All in all, a WIN for me! Hopefully next time it will be an even shorter process til I move on to the smiling and acceptance part.